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Opinion: Ohio State should invest in two-ply toilet paper

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Photo illustration by: Jon McAllister / Asst. photo editor

Photo illustration by: Jon McAllister / Asst. photo editor

I don’t like to express my opinion on most topics. One-ply toilet paper is another story.

In the restrooms on campus lies the enemy: A material thinner than paper, one that breaks when you try to tear off a sheet of it.

In this situation, I often feel like Oliver Twist, constantly asking for more, more please. But I do not want more one-ply.

Venturing into the restrooms on campus makes me reminisce of old times, times when I lived at my parents’ house and they provided Charmin Ultra Soft. I miss the endless supply of the soft and durable bath tissue my dad kept stocked away.

When I’m home, I often steal packages of it for my own consumption, mostly because I don’t have the funds to indulge in such a commodity. When I visit family and friends, I admire their supplies.

This should not be the case. With in-state tuition being about $10,000 for tuition, you’d think some of this would be put toward soft bath tissue — some that provides an enjoyable restroom experience instead of a dreadful one.

For example, a 20-count of Scott one-ply bath tissue from Walmart costs $12.97, whereas a 24-count of Angel Soft bath tissue is $5.97. At those prices, 48 rolls of Angel Soft could be purchased for every 20-count of Scott one-ply. Although Angel Soft is not the best, it would suffice compared with what is currently being stocked in campus bathrooms, and it might even be half the price.

There are more than 58,000 students who attend Ohio State, and I cannot be the only one who holds an opinion on the subject. I say down with one-ply. Let’s invest in comfort.

3 comments

  1. Your figures are a little misleading.

    Simply put, each roll of Scott has 1000 sheets (or “squares”). The Angel Soft listed on Wal-Mart’s website is for their Double Roll for $10.97, which contains 264 “squares” per roll (the label states this is double the regular roll quantity of 132 “squares” per roll.)

    Therefore, on a per sheet basis, the costs break down as such:
    Scott = $0.0006485
    Angel = $0.0017313

    Even if you were to argue that you need to use double the amount of tissue to equal the two-ply, your costs would still be $0.004343 less than the Angel Soft. That may not seem like much, but calculated on a per-package basis, you are saving $8.69 by buying the Scotts. ($.004343 x 1000 sheets x 20 rolls per pack)

    Now think about how many packages of tissue that the University consumes on an annual basis, and you can really see how the savings add up.

  2. Best article to grace this dreadful news source.

  3. Ken, good work with the math on the real costs. Although as someone who has used that 1 ply before, i would say I used about 6 times as much 1 ply as I do 2 ply simply because I use more to assure I won’t break through and get poop on my hands.

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