Dear Amartano,How have you been? This week has been unusually relaxing for me. I really don’t know why, but it just has, so its been a good week.Writing you last week was awkward for me, because you asked me about a topic that is difficult for anyone to be completely “objective” about. I appreciated that you considered the facts and said no to having sex with your friend of the opposite sex.Now, I want to apologize, because I don’t think I’ve done a good job on really letting you see where I stand on what the best context is for sex.So because of that, I fully understand where your question for this week came from. You asked me, “Since you aren’t supportive of homosexual behavior and last week you showed me the pitfalls of heterosexual activity, do you just hate the idea of sex in general?”This is the first time one of your questions just made me laugh out loud.No, my friend, I don’t hate the idea of it. Actually, I believe sex in the proper context is one of the most beautiful expressions of love a man and a woman can share. So, now, you are probably trying to figure out what I mean when I say “proper context.”Well, I honestly think there is only one context for it: marriage. Yes, I said it and I believe it. The only context sex should be experienced in is between a husband and his wife in the freedom of holy matrimony. I know, you are probably thinking, ” What? You didn’t just say that, did you?” Yes, Amartano, I did, and I will stand behind it.Sex is more than just a physical act of pleasure. I think most who have had sex will agree. What is a person saying when they have sex with a person? Usually, I think it is more than just “I want your body.”That is why sex is often referred to incorrectly in the movies as “making love.” For in that moment, you are giving yourself to that person so that they may find delight in you, as you find delight in them. In that moment, you are giving yourself to a person in a way that can’t be taken back. In that moment, you are giving yourself to a person in way you won’t give yourself to everyone you know.This Hollywood depiction of love is misconstrued. This isn’t love. It is a sad attempt at manufacturing what truly isn’t there, it’s like a quiet plea for something more than what they experience. Love is not a one-time act. Love is choosing to sacrifice, to give of yourself consistently. Sex does not equal love. Sex is an expression of love.That expression of love has been designed solely for marriage. That is because only in marriage can a man and a woman honestly say I commit all of me to love you as best I can. When I put that ring on a woman’s finger, I am committing myself exclusively to her best. That’s why I believe in the sanctity of marriage. Another thing that gets to me is that I see so many couples say that sexual intercourse in a relationship before marriage is okay. I disagree.Even if the relationship is monogamous, are you guaranteed to be there for each other? No, you are not. Can you even make that commitment? No, that is not the nature or purpose of dating relationships. Dating relationships are used to see if you want to spend the rest of your life with someone. So you can’t make that commitment until you’ve come to the point of marriage.It scares me to think that, by one act, I would communicate all the things that sex signifies to someone, things that I may not be there for in the morning. That’s just not right.Added to this, I guess somewhere in me is a closet romantic. I would love to be able to say to my wife, “I waited, because I wanted you to be the only one who has this part of me. I wanted you to know I was committed to you before I even knew you.”Amartano, my friend, let me leave you by saying, “any sex outside the context of marriage is not only not the best, but it can only do harm.” Think about it.Your Friend.
Jason George is a senior majoring in journalism. If you wish to write him, he can be reached at george.161@osu.