If you can’t beat them, get plastic surgery. This is what I’ve decided will be my new motto for the year. With reality TV shows still strangling our television sets it seems no matter what channel I flip to there is a person wanting a nip here, a tuck there, and in some cases enough plastic in their body to moonlight as a beach ball.
Being a pop culture whore, I’ve watched enough reality shows to realize that I should be disgusted at the lengths networks will go for the name of entertainment, but being disgusted and not wanting to watch the drama that nose shaving and breast implants cause is different.
During the beginning of the school year I found myself captivated by one reality show in particular – “The Joe Schmo Show.” The program hooked the audience by having one person in the cast believe he was on a reality show competing for money and prizes. In reality the rest of the contestants on the show were paid actors. Watching this show was something of a guilty pleasure for me because I knew that at the end of each episode the main character would need more therapy than he needed the week before.
What I learned from watching Joe Schmo was having a show designed for no other purpose other than to see how far you can push someone’s buttons is like holding a magnifying glass over an ant just to see it squirm. There is something wrong about it, but it still fun. I knew that something in me said the show is morally wrong, but I wanted to know what they would make him do next and I continued to watch. After the show ended, I felt that I could handle any ridiculous concept that network gurus could throw at me and decided that if people wanted their 15 minutes of fame, it was only fitting for them to earn it in a cruel sociological experiment. But that was before I began seeing commercials for “The Swan.”
Leave it to Fox, the creative minds that brought you “Paradise Hotel,” to upset the happy reality TV equilibrium I had created for myself. Tonight is the inaugural episode of “The Swan”- Fox’s new reality show that aims to take 17, self-described less- than-attractive “ugly ducklings” and turn them into beautiful “swans” through surgery, diet, therapy and image depravation – a fancy way of saying there won’t be any mirrors around to see how the scars look.
Then after these women have gone through “makeover boot camp” they will compete against each other in the “Swan Pageant” for the honor of being named the Ultimate Swan – or as I would prefer to call it, the one who has to deal with the 16 women who reinvented themselves just to be told they were losers again.
Why hasn’t anyone spoken out against a show like this? Where is Dr. Phil with an inspirational quote? If Janet Jackson’s breast could cause a tidal wave of controversy wouldn’t it make sense that a show that caters to stereotypes is just as harmful?
I understand that I haven’t yet watched the show and am making a broad argument. The fact may be these women truly think self-mutilation is the only way to achieve happiness. What I can say is, I can only hope “The Swan” doesn’t mimic MTV’s current show “I want a Famous Face,” a program where people have plastic surgery to look like their favorite celebrity.
Television shows such as “The Swan” and “I Want a Famous Face” inadvertently teach people that it is acceptable to change their body so others will be more happy with the way they look. Everytime I’ve seen a show dealing with cosmetic surgery I always hear the patient say, “I’m doing this so I can feel better about myself.” But isn’t it true in most cases people undergo the procedures so others will look at them differently and not because a stronger jaw line would help them sleep better at night.
After watching reality TV trash for the last few years, I truly believed it couldn’t get worse. Tonight after the show has ended, I pray that it hasn’t gotten worse and television has some sense of dignity left. If this isn’t the case – I’ve always wanted to be a John Cusack impersonator.
David Cross is a senior in journalism. He can be reached for comment at [email protected].
