College places fewer restrictions on sexuality then almost any other phase in life. Students talk about drunken one-night stands and friends with benefits like it’s a completely normal topic. Yet like race, certain topics regarding sexuality are off-limits because of the issues they confront.
For example, the difference between male and female homosexuality is huge but almost never discussed. Casual female homosexuality is rampant in popular culture and viewed far more positively than causal male homosexuality. One would only need to watch the difference between a straight girl telling her friends she made out with another girl at a bar last night and a straight guy telling his friends how he made out with another guy at that same bar. While female homosexuality has been played for seduction in hundreds of mainstream movies and television shows, male homosexuality is played for humor (such as “I now Pronounce you Chuck and Larry” or “Bruno”). The reaction to “Brokeback Mountain” shows how uncomfortable many are with non-humorous displays of male homosexuality.
Opponents of homosexuality tend to focus disproportionately on the negative aspects of gay males. On the conservative Family Research Council’s Web site, arguments focus on how the average male homosexual has “hundreds of partners over their lifetime” and that “gay men could not form a monogamous union.” This absolute disgust with gay men was a sharp contrast to the few sentences devoted to lesbians, which focused almost exclusively on domestic violence rates. While one hears often of “Adam and Steve” in anti-gay marriage protests the female equivalent is not heard.
Heterosexual issues are not immune to this silence. The double standard in regards to men, women and sex is better known but rarely talked about. For example, the Madonna/whore complex refers to labeling women who enjoy casual sex as whores. Men who enjoy casual sex get no such title or connotation of evil. The expectation of a woman to be pure and innocent while also being sexy and attractive is a hypocritical and impossible burden.
Open discussion of human sexuality is a highly delicate affair. When biologist Alfred Kinsey released his seminal work on sexuality in the late 1940s he was reviled not just because of the claims he made (many are doubted or questionable) but because he approached sexuality in an open and scientific manner. For the first time topics such as masturbation, extramarital sex and homosexuality were being addressed and quantified. Likewise, when Camille Paglia talked about male sexuality, rape and female culpability the reaction was violent.
Those on the left want the differences between genders and their sexuality to disappear, while those on the right just want sexuality to go away. When talking about the vile origins of many cultural values, German historian Freidrich Meinecke remarked that “God needed the devil to realize himself.” When it comes to human sexuality and the origin of sexual mores the devil is staring back at us in the mirror.
