Zhenel Rawlinson, performing under the artist name “Zhenel,” uses a soulful sound and poetic lyrics to convey empathy to listeners. Credit: Courtesy of JusDevin
Growing up with parents who were both struggling music artists while living in a low-income household with five younger siblings, alternative R&B artist and producer “Zhenel” Rawlinson said she is no stranger to both the beauty and the hardships of trying to make it in the music industry.
Rawlinson, a third-year in music, said she now uses her personal struggles, experiences and pain to uplift others through her music.
“When you’re listening to my music, I want people to feel heard, I don’t want to just sing and just put it out because I’m not doing my job,” Rawlinson said. “I want to help heal people, I want to be there with people on their journey.”
Rawlinson released her latest album “Random” Dec. 4, 2020. The 17-track project presents an experimental mix of R&B, soul and hip-hop, Rawlinson said.
“When I put the album out, I was crying, of course, tears of joy,” Rawlinson said. “I was proud of myself, I was happy, but at the same time I didn’t realize that I had so much stuff that was built up until I actually listened to the stuff that I was saying.”
Rawlinson grew up in Memphis, Tennessee. As the oldest of six kids, she was no stranger to responsibility when she came to Ohio State in 2018.
“My parents divorced when I was 9 or so, and I’ve probably been to 10 different schools before I came to college,” Rawlinson said. “I was constantly having to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders, oftentimes having to carry everyone else’s burden.”
Both Rawlinson’s mother and father are musicians themselves, and she grew up hearing all different styles of music such as rock, hip-hop, reggae, country, gospel, bluegrass and heavy metal. Ultimately, her parents’ music helped shape her own sound, Rawlinson said.
When Rawlinson was about 11 or 12 years old, she created her first acoustic track using GarageBand on her iPod. At that time, Rawlinson wanted to be a rap artist and was especially inspired by Drake, she said.
It wasn’t until she was 16 or 17 years old that Rawlinson began singing on tracks. She finished an unreleased five-track EP in 2017 and an unreleased album later that year, just two months before she graduated high school, she said.
Even though Rawlinson was creating music, she didn’t feel particularly confident as an artist yet, she said.
“A lot of that had to do with watching managers screw over my mom and stuff like that, or watching my dad work 12-hour shifts daily,” Rawlinson said. “But I knew just how much they had a passion for music.”
When Rawlinson began her education at Ohio State, she quickly established herself as a charismatic peer and leader, Laura Portune, Rawlinson’s voice professor and voice lecturer at Ohio State, said. During required semesterly voice exams known as “juries,” Portune said Rawlinson, a first-year at the time, arrived early to support her peers.
“She stood out in the hallway and was the cheering squad for every single person that went in into the jury,” Portune said. “And I remember going out and getting my students as they would come in and I just kept seeing her. And I was like, ‘You’re not singing until later tonight, why are you here?’ And she’s like, ‘Oh, I’m just being encouraging and I’m just helping people, so they’re not so nervous.’”
In late 2019, after spending almost two years at Ohio State studying to be a music educator, Rawlinson was unsure about her career path and considered dropping out.
“I wanted to be a teacher because my family and friends were like, ‘You know, you won’t be able to make it in music. You should just be a teacher, do something that’s representable.’ So I kinda played it a little bit safe,” Rawlinson said.
That same year, Rawlinson was entered as a late addition to perform at the African American Heritage Festival at Ohio State after Timothy Hinton, a fourth-year in psychology and the leader of the Black Humanities organization on campus, advocated for her. The experience ultimately helped Rawlinson gain confidence as an artist and served as a crucial part of her career, she said.
Rawlinson was also able to open for Playboi Carti during the 2019 Find Your Grind University Festival hosted by the Ohio Union Activities Board and performed as the opener for singer DaniLeigh’s performance at the Newport that same year.
Portune said she was impressed with Rawlinson’s unique voice and vocal range, as well as the fact that Rawlinson writes her own music.
“I was really blown away because she is able to pivot between these genres and classical music was still new to her, but it was something that she completely embraced and was willing to try out even though it was new,” Portune said. “I think one of the things about her that is so unique is her range, because she is very comfortable in this extremely low range for a female voice.”
As a Black female artist, Rawlinson said she struggled with lack of representation and people telling her who she can and can’t be.
“I’ve taken being the only Black person in the class, or Black woman as well, and being able to show up and just show out, like, ‘Look, I’m here, you’re not going to tell me to shut up, you’re not going to tell me what to do with my life,’” Rawlinson said. “You know, I’m not doing that for anybody. I did that for too long.”
Rawlinson said she is inspired by Black women and hopes she can inspire them in turn by being unabashedly herself.
“There are Black women who are in the light right now, showing up and showing out there doing positive things in their own way,” Rawlinson said. “It’s just really, really unfortunate how the media paints them to be, paints us to be like, ‘Oh that’s ghetto, we don’t approve of that.’ But at the end of the day, we’re unapologetic, we’re unbothered and we’re gonna shine regardless.”
