Ohio State then-sophomore offensive lineman Harry Miller (76) holds back a Nebraska player during the Ohio State-Nebraska game on Oct.24, 2020. Ohio State won 52-17. Credit: Mackenzie Shanklin | Photo Editor
Content warning: This story contains mention of self-harm and suicide. National Suicide Prevention 24/7 Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
Junior offensive lineman Harry Miller announced he’s retiring from football on Twitter Thursday, revealing challenges with his mental health.
In the post, Miller said he wanted to share his story and motivation for stepping away from the football field.
“Prior to the season last year, I told Coach Day of my intention to kill myself,” Miller said. “He immediately had me in touch with Dr. Candice and Dr. Norman, and I received the support I needed.”
Miller said he was not planning on sharing the personal details behind his retirement, but his position as a collegiate football player did not grant him much privacy, and the public constantly questioned why he wasn’t playing. He also said he wanted to share his experiences with mental illness to fight the stigma surrounding mental health.
“I saw how easy it was for people to dismiss others by talking about how they were just a dumb, college kid who didn’t know anything,” he said. “But luckily, I am a student in the College of Engineering, and I have a 4.0 and whatever accolades you might require, so maybe if somebody’s hurt can be taken seriously for once, it can be mine.”
In his statement, Miller also revealed that he tried to conceal his struggles with mental illness in front of his peers and the college football community.
“Maybe the scars were hard to see with my wrists taped up. Maybe it was hard to see the scars through the bright colors of the television. Maybe the scars were hard to hear through all the talk shows and interviews. They are hard to see, and they are easy to hide, but they sure do hurt,” he said. “There was a dead man on the television set, but nobody knew it.”
In the statement, Miller said he saw how easily people dismiss others who speak about their mental health, and he stressed that this is an issue that affects everyone.
“This is not an issue reserved for the far and away,” Miller said. “It is in our homes. It is in our conversations. It is in the people we love.”
Miller joined the Ohio State program prior to the 2019 season. He played in 13 games before starting seven in 2020.
Miller dealt with knee and lower-leg injuries during his Buckeyes football career. He also suffered a torn labrum and missed spring practice in 2021.
Ohio State’s football program did not have a comment at the time of publication.
Ohio State athletic director Gene Smith commended Miller for coming forward with his story in a tweet Thursday.
“It takes uncommon courage to be so vulnerable. Thank you for sharing. So proud of you and always here for you!” Smith stated.
Miller said he’ll remain close to the team and he’s grateful for both the support head coach Ryan Day provided and his willingness to allow Miller to “find a new way to help others in the program.”
“I hope athletic departments around the country do the same,” Miller said. “If not for him and the staff, my words would not be a reflection. They would be evidence in a post-mortem.”
If you or someone you know is experiencing thoughts of self-harm or suicide, seek medical help. In case of life-threatening situations, call 911.
Hotlines:
- National Suicide Prevention 24/7 Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
- Columbus Suicide 24/7 Hotline: 614-221-5445
- CCS Crisis Hotline (after-hours consultation): 614-292-5766 and choose option 2
Text lines:
- National 24/7 Crisis Text Line: Text “HOME” to 741-741
- Ohio Department of Mental Health and Addiction Services 24/7 Crisis Text Line: Text “4HOPE” to 741-741
