Satire: Crime brief: Probably a bunch of it, pretty much everywhere

Satire: Aaron Craft screws up his own bracket

Satire: Record-breaking 18 people vote in this year’s USG election

Satire: Perfectly healthy student emails prof claiming to have ‘strep throat’

Satire: Rapper Drake to become the next president of Ohio State

Satire: Report: Absolutely zero students in Greek Life arrested this week at Ohio State

Satire: More butts please: OSU officially becomes a ‘Free Tobacco’ campus

Satire: Student signs another loan he won’t pay back

Satire: Ohio State announces plans to switch back to quarters next semester

Satire: Ecologists anticipate Wolverines to go extinct next week